Am I Pushing Them Too Hard?

I was reading on Monk Man's birth board and the post I read was about how independent your 5 year old is. I was SHOCKED at some of the things I read that average 5 year old kids were not doing.

Just a few of the things that made me go, what the hell?:
~~Not showering/bathing alone
Monk Man has been showering and taking baths alone since he was 3. I even trust him enough to put Bobblehead in there with him once in a while. And even HE takes showers and baths alone most of the time.

~~Not wiping their own asses
Really? Gross. I stopped wiping asses when they stopped wearing diapers. It is part of my potty training process. It is simple...you go, you wipe, you flush.

~~Not pouring their own drinks
I can understand this. At 5, they are clumsy as hell and make scary messes. But they also learn how to help clean up their messes. If mom and dad ALWAYS pour the drinks, the kids never learn how to do it themselves.

~~Not getting their own stall in a public restroom
I give my boys plenty of privacy. Bobblehead is still too young to be trusted alone in a public restroom. There are just too many cool things to play with and break in there. But Monk Man? Of course he goes to the bathroom alone. If we are at a place that we know well, like local restaurants, he goes alone. If we are at a very crowded place or out of town, Hubbs or I walk him to the bathroom door but we wait outside.

~~Not dressing themselves
The boys have jeans and tshirts, shorts are added in the summer and coats are added in the winter. If it is an issue with the clothes not matching, well, it's kinda hard to screw up jeans and tshirts. I did that on purpose. They also know which clothes are theirs, Monk Mans are the big ones and Bobbleheads are the little ones. If they happen to get confused, we laugh about it and they go try again. I have tried my damnedest to make getting dressed very easy for them to do.

~~Not brushing their own hair
Ok, this one is just silly if you have a boy. I can understand the girls needing help. But boys? Boy hair is awesomely easy. Monk Man has a Mohawk and does it himself. Bobblehead has a buzz cut but is able to run a comb through it if needed.

What the shit, right? My 3 year old can do most of this stuff.



But then I started feeling bad. Just a little though.

It made me question what my boys ARE doing. Is it NOT normal for them to be able to do things on their own? Am I pushing them too hard? Am I going to screw them up and cause them to need therapy because I won't wipe their asses or make them, gasp, play out in the backyard, double gasp, unsupervised?

Help Me Choose

Ugh, why do I have to make the decisions?

Here is the deal. Hubbs is an Elks Club member. The Elks picnic is this weekend and the big Chili Cookoff is next weekend.


Do we:
A. Go to the picnic on Saturday
B. Go camping for the weekend just the family
C. Stay home to do some much needed housework

Personally, I don't care where we go, as long as we go SOMEWHERE this weekend. Out of town is out of town. I don't think Hubbs wants to go to the picnic since he left the decision up to me. If he wanted to go, he would have decided that all on his own. And, the boys don't even know that it is an option, so if we do decide to go, it would be a surprise. And on top of it, we would have to leave the dogs home if we go to the picnic. If they see us loading up to go to the woods without them they are going to be so pissed.

BUT, the picnic is geared towards the kids with the games and contests and such. Plus they need interaction with other kids and out there, I have no choice but to let them run free with the other kids. It is only fair to let them go to the picnic since Hubbs and I have the Chili Cookoff.

BUT, the house is out of control. The floors need to be mopped, the carpets vacuumed, everything dusted, the office/toy room needs to be picked up and mopped, the grass needs to be mowed, the weeds needs to be pulled, the patio hosed off, a shed needs to be built, the garden needs some attention. I could go on but I am getting depressed by how much crap needs to be done.

Ugh, and then next weekend I get to do this all over again. Chili Cookoff, family camping or housework. I am not even sure I want to go to the Chili Cookoff this year either. I much prefer being with a small group rather than a huge group.