**sob** My Squash

I spent an hour pulling up all my damn squash plants last night.

I had gotten home around 5ish and went outside to pull some weeds and see if there were any new squash. I hadn't been out to look in a week because of the massive amount of rain we have gotten lately.

I got the weeds pulled and started lifting up the squash plant leafs and reaching around, moving the mess around so I could get to the squash. I happened to glance at the underside of a leaf and saw a bunch of egg clusters on it. I pulled the leaf off and started checking the rest of the leafs for more eggs.

Every single leaf had eggs on it. And then I started noticing the squash beetles. I bet I saw 5 of those nasty ass little things at first glance.

Grooooossssss. I don't do well with bugs anymore.

Monk Man was kneeling in the grass looking for bugs with me (of course). I told him to run and bring the big trash can over to me. I was in my Birks so I ran inside to get a real pair of shoes on. My dumb ass know better than to try to garden in sandals but knowing and doing are 2 different things.

That's it! The squash was fun while it lasted. Those damn things were going in the garbage if it took me all night.

So Monk Man finally got the trash can over to me, after we played 20 questions about why I needed it.

I grabbed ahold of a big set of leafs and pulled. And pulled. Finally the plant came out of the dirt. It was COVERED with the squash beetles.

Yep. Pulling out the plants was a good idea because THEN I saw a freaking Black Widow spider crawling around in the dirt. I dropped the f-bomb and squealed Eeewwww like a little girl. I am sure my neighbors were quite entertained watching me swear like a sailor and jump around the back yard flapping my arms in disgust.

Spanky had taught me (burned into my brain) at a very young age to squish ANY Black Widow spider I came across because they would bite me and whatever body part that spider bit would have to be cut off. I am pretty sure that isn't really true but his story worked. I don't screw around with spiders.

Now, all 12 of my squash plants are in the dumpster and the spiders are killed (hopefully).

When I was finished, I had the worse case of heebie jeebies ever. I was convinced that the bugs were hiding in my clothes and in my hair. I was covered in dirt from head to toe. Being the overly concerned mommy that I am, I made Monk Man strip down so I could check him for bugs. Yes, right there in the middle of the back yard.

The other plants that were around the squash seem to be unaffected by the bugs so that is a good thing. The carrots are tall and bushy. The peppers are getting big. The onions are pungent. Not a bug to be found this morning.